Friday, July 18, 2008

A Day In The Life Of Rich Morning

Thank Godzilla it's Friday!

Most of you know Friday as the day after Thursday, and the day before Saturday, but Friday is so much more than that. For example, these are just some of the things I do on Fridays. Here it is, a day in the life of Rich Morning.


-Wake up, 10 AM
-Take a birdbath, blow dry feathers.
-Have personal assistant choose outfit for me.
-Refuse to wear said outfit, fire personal assistant.
-Eventually choose same outfit chosen by former personal assistant.
-Rehire former personal assistant, making her current personal assistant.
-Go outside to greet the day.


-Meet with superagent Ron 'The Camel' Goldstein at his Beverly Hills Home.
-Eat organic, fair trade vegan birdseed with a few strawberry daiquiries.
-Discuss future projects with Ron, including possible romantic comedy film with Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen.
-Listen to Ron discuss personal problems like water retention and difficulty humping.

Early afternoon:

-Roller blade at Venice beach and pump some iron with local bodybuilders.
-Contemplate tattooing neck with Rich Morning Show Logo... settle for a temporary tattoo and a chocolate milkshake.
-Read Steven Speilberg script with mild interest, call agent to reject it.


-Head to the Burbank studio to interview potential show guests, including a donkey named Max who loves to kick people when they aren't looking.
-After show medic diagnoses me with severe concussion, decide that Max won't work out.
-Exchange phone numbers with sexy pelican dancer, make plans to meet her at the club later on.
-Order 16 cases of Crystal champagne to studio just for the fun of it.
-Play quick game of badminton with Priscilla and Karl, associate producers and rabbits.

-Head back to Casa de Rich, film segment for MTV Cribs.
-Show camera man my nest and tell him 'this is where the magic happens'.
-Find Ostrich egg I had been looking for since June of last year, place it on bookshelf, in between my Grammy and a signed photo of the Crocodile Hunter (Rest in Peace)


Lobster at Nobu, plus three Zimas and a Snapple.
For desert, a couple of bottles of O2 at the local Oxygen bar.

Late night:
Head to the club...

The rest is censored... sorry folks. In any case, enjoy your weekend and stay tuned for more Rich Morning madness next week!

Peace out!



Anonymous Delphine said...

Sooooo, Rich!?? Did you make out with sexy pelican dancer???!

August 27, 2008 at 6:29 PM  

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